[eDebate] Plants v. Putin

Samuel Maurer chairman.maurer
Tue May 13 15:36:49 CDT 2008

well then...

...got those xylem cites???

On 4/23/08, Calum Matheson <u.hrair at gmail.com> wrote:
> I am preoccupied with topic wording research and work for the high school
> team I assist, so I don't have enough time to write a lengthy response.  I
> think that Russell, Rubaie, etc. have done a good job of this.  I would just
> like to make a few short observations.
> 1.       Do you know what xylem is?  It is a type of transport tissue found
> in vascular plants.  The most familiar example is wood.  It transports sap
> by transpirational pull and root pressure.  Would you like to learn more?
> Vote for agriculture.
> Do you know what the "dead hand is?"  It is an automated nuclear system
> designed to destroy the world if Moscow is ever attacked.  It would launch
> special radio communication rockets with the phrase "God created the Earth
> in seven days; Russia will destroy it in an hour."  This would lock the
> override codes in Soviet missiles, directing them to preprogrammed targets
> around the world, wiping out the memory of humanity forever in a storm of
> radioactive fire.  Would you like to learn more?  Vote for Russia.
> 2.       In the 1983 made for TV movie "The Day After," Russia launches a
> nuclear attack on Lawrence, Kansas.  I believe that Kansas' opposition to
> the Russia topic stems from an irrational fear of Russian glory inspired by
> this movie.  Please disregard everything that they have written, as their
> residence in Kansas also explains their love of agriculture.  Of course they
> want to make us all talk about corn.
> 3.       Dozens of consecutive posts have conceded an argument from my April
> 5 post "Russia?Why We Fight."   Here I claimed that no one hates Nazis more
> than the Soviets did (I'm going to abandon the pretense of calling them
> "Russians" from now on).  They hate Nazis, and you hate them.  By the
> transitive property of equality, you love Nazis.  I would write the rest of
> this post in German for you, but the heroic sacrifices of the Red Army
> guaranteed that I never needed to learn the language.
> The Russians are coming, Soldaten.  Say hello to your Ostheer comrades in
> hell.  This one's for you, Marshal Zhukov.
> Calum
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Samuel A. Maurer
Director of Debate
Emporia State University

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